on the wickedness of bakers* -or- moldingbordegate many people (even pimplefaces) enjoy a good scam story. one of my favourite scams is called the moldingborde gambit and was pioneered back in 1327. to understand the moldingborde gambit, you must first understand that in 1327, there wasn’t yet such a thing as a third generation ipod much less such a thing as a home oven. therefore, in order to bake the family bread, one had to take the family dough to a third party to bake it. this is how the scam starts: and when his neighbours and others, who were wont to bake their bread at his oven, came with their dough, or material for making bread, he put such dough upon the moldingborde over an artfully concealed hole. He then had one of his household sitting in secret beneath such table. This person carefully opened the secret hole and piecemeal and bit by bit craftily withdrew some of the dough aforesaid, frequently collecting great quantities from such dough, falsely, wickedly, and maliciously, to the great loss of all his neighbours and persons living near, and of others who had come to him with such dough to bake, and to the scandal and disgrace of the whole City. just imagine ALL THE FREE DOUGH that this wicked baker was able to nick over the years!!! what a scam! however, as testament to the fact that good always triumphs over evil, eight indictments were handed down to 6 bakers and 2 bakeresses in the subsequent moldingbordegate investigation. each party was wrapped with dough and then forced to stand in the pillory while the townspeople that they defrauded pelted them with moldy rolls and screamed disparaging things about their mothers. __ *does not apply to all bakers.source: memorials of london and london life (1868).

on the wickedness of bakers* -or- moldingbordegate

many people (even pimplefaces) enjoy a good scam story. one of my favourite scams is called the moldingborde gambit and was pioneered back in 1327. to understand the moldingborde gambit, you must first understand that in 1327, there wasn’t yet such a thing as a third generation ipod much less such a thing as a home oven. therefore, in order to bake the family bread, one had to take the family dough to a third party to bake it. this is how the scam starts:

and when his neighbours and others, who were wont to bake their bread at his oven, came with their dough, or material for making bread, he put such dough upon the moldingborde over an artfully concealed hole. He then had one of his household sitting in secret beneath such table. This person carefully opened the secret hole and piecemeal and bit by bit craftily withdrew some of the dough aforesaid, frequently collecting great quantities from such dough, falsely, wickedly, and maliciously, to the great loss of all his neighbours and persons living near, and of others who had come to him with such dough to bake, and to the scandal and disgrace of the whole City.

just imagine ALL THE FREE DOUGH that this wicked baker was able to nick over the years!!! what a scam! however, as testament to the fact that good always triumphs over evil, eight indictments were handed down to 6 bakers and 2 bakeresses in the subsequent moldingbordegate investigation. each party was wrapped with dough and then forced to stand in the pillory while the townspeople that they defrauded pelted them with moldy rolls and screamed disparaging things about their mothers.

__

*does not apply to all bakers.
source: memorials of london and london life (1868).

February 17, 2010
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