ingloosh

from a friend:

To keep from hurting students’ feelings, getting fired, or constantly boiling over in conversation with neighbors, I’ve decided to declare English a dead language and to call what many speak “Ingloosh.” Hence: “Yes, Chairperson, I would never question your mastery of Ingloosh!” To a student: “I am pleased to say that, for a Zairean who has lived here for only three hours, you have a wonderfully adequate grasp of Ingloosh!” To myself: “Thank goodness these television broadcasters can no longer do harm to English, which is now a dead language; I can just kick back and listen to their Ingloosh without getting all huffy and puffy every night!”