dem hats
everyone is always asking me, “gee, raynor: where do you always find dem period hats?” while this swedish cartoon from 1904 isn’t my answer, it is an answer.
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more from oskar anderson’s mannen som gör vad som faller honom in (including this rainy day classic) can be found here.
![beetlemania
you see this little idiot? he mends your stockings for you. according to the accompanying captions from the photostory, you can compensate him in brown sugar and lodge him in your compact case.
do you know how many stockings that i paid my neighbour beaucoup bucks to repair for me because stockings are really expensive and what else am i supposed to wear to the many luncheons in which i am [the guest of] the guest of honour? answer: at least 1 pair. peta be damned! this is the business opportunity that i have been waiting for.
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source: life magazine (1937)
the fine print: it would be delinquent of me not to mention that the topic of the broader article regarded german newspaper april fools gags. the other ones: a ten-stack oceanliner, a lake which changes your gender in its reflection of you, and a headless dog are also worthy of your brief attention span.](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l9kaeyb95R1qzrip0o1_500.png)
beetlemania
you see this little idiot? he mends your stockings for you. according to the accompanying captions from the photostory, you can compensate him in brown sugar and lodge him in your compact case.
do you know how many stockings that i paid my neighbour beaucoup bucks to repair for me because stockings are really expensive and what else am i supposed to wear to the many luncheons in which i am [the guest of] the guest of honour? answer: at least 1 pair. peta be damned! this is the business opportunity that i have been waiting for.
__
source: life magazine (1937)
the fine print: it would be delinquent of me not to mention that the topic of the broader article regarded german newspaper april fools gags. the other ones: a ten-stack oceanliner, a lake which changes your gender in its reflection of you, and a headless dog are also worthy of your brief attention span.
this one from victorian england:
Here lies Lady O’ Looney,
Great niece of Burke,
commonly called “The Sublime.”
She was bland, passionate, and deeply religious;
Also she painted in water colors,
And sent several pictures to the Exhibition,
She was first cousin of Lady Jones,
And of such is the kingdom of Heaven
and this one from gold rush-era california:
Here lies the body of Jeemes Humbrick who was accidentally shot on the bank of the Pacus River by a young man. He was accidentally shot with one of the large Colt’s revolvers with no stopper for the cock to rest on. It was one of the old-fashioned kind—brass mounted. And of such is the kingdom of heaven.
“here satan letteth a fart”
found in english morality plays of the 16th century. (source)
baconian method
it’s every philosopher’s favourite parlour game and it’s sweeping the nation: six degrees of francis bacon!
from action philosophers #3 by fred van lente and ryan dunlavey (2007).
more here. also not to miss is this rendition of joseph campbell’s monomyth.
emigre has finally released a mr eaves typeface and thus a new character is introduced in the exciting adventures of john baskerville & mrs eaves series.
also, this has allowed me to finally make use of the new sex position that i discovered a year ago.
make certain that there is NO liquid in your mouth when reading the last bullet or you will be doing a spit take worthy of groucho marx »
the graffito reads, “toy story 2 was o.k.!”
vartan gregorian elementary school, providence, ri (august 2009).
July 30, 1710
In the afternoon my wife and I had a little quarrel which I reconciled with a flourish… It is to be observed that the flourish was performed on the billiard table.
from how i became a famous novelist, by steve hely (2009).
the complete list (in genuine nyt fauxness) which also includes non-fiction best sellers can be found here.
in addition: you can tweet (as i have done) your own descriptions of fake best sellers with the #hely tag.
onemorething: here is another highlarryus list of other ficitonal books that appear in the life of gargantua and pantagruel.
![to craunch the marmoset »
English as She Is Spoke is the common name of a 19th century book credited to José da Fonseca and Pedro Carolino, which was intended as a Portuguese-English conversational guide or phrase book, but is regarded as a classic source of unintentional humour.
The humour is a result of dictionary-aided literal translation, [from Portugese to French and then to English] which causes many idiomatic expressions to be translated wildly inappropriately.
He is beggar as a church rat
Friendship of a child is water into a basket
Burn the politeness
After the paunch comes the dance
To make paps for the cats
Mark Twain said of English as She Is Spoke that “Nobody can add to the absurdity of this book, nobody can imitate it successfully, nobody can hope to produce its fellow; it is perfect.”
try the technique at home for FREE.](http://26.media.tumblr.com/3FZnoU8PUmitr0yu6sIJj72Fo1_400.jpg)
to craunch the marmoset »
English as She Is Spoke is the common name of a 19th century book credited to José da Fonseca and Pedro Carolino, which was intended as a Portuguese-English conversational guide or phrase book, but is regarded as a classic source of unintentional humour.
The humour is a result of dictionary-aided literal translation, [from Portugese to French and then to English] which causes many idiomatic expressions to be translated wildly inappropriately.
- He is beggar as a church rat
- Friendship of a child is water into a basket
- Burn the politeness
- After the paunch comes the dance
- To make paps for the cats
Mark Twain said of English as She Is Spoke that “Nobody can add to the absurdity of this book, nobody can imitate it successfully, nobody can hope to produce its fellow; it is perfect.”
try the technique at home for FREE.
“manifest destiny,” by tom toles, from the new republic (2004).
april fools!
