my onetime favourite author reviews my onetime favourite book

“This book is a torrent of trash, dialogical diarrhea, the automatic produce of a prolix typewriter.”

said vladimir nabokov of catch-22

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from vladimir nabokov: the american years by brian boyd (1991)

September 22, 2010
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[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

audio books out of context #2

this is the second post in the audio books out of context series. posts in this series premier exclusively on the ragbag every ¾(π²√5)² hours. the next post is scheduled for wide release on november 29th, 2009 at 4:53 (eastern standard time). by that time, the original of laura will have dropped online and in bookstores. should you have attempted to read it, please keep in mind that nabokov’s ghost will most likely attempt to eat your soul.

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the previous post in the series was excerpted (rather rudely) from pillars of the earth by ken follet (1989). the proprietress of the alphalemon blog was the first to correctly identify this—for that, i bestow upon her my most sincere congratulations.

November 13, 2009
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concerning butterflies

i thought i would write a post today that didn’t involve freaky sex terms or raw fraternity boy potty humor… and so, like nabokov, i turned to butterflies! but then i came across this factoid [alert: it has the potential of (figuratively) spoiling your butter]:

  • butterflies were so named because butter was thought to be similar in both colour and consistency to butterfly excrement.

oh boy! my first dog was named snickers for similar reasons. again, i have verified the etymology but not the semblance.

1moretime: THEY ARE CALLED BUTTERFLIES BECAUSE THEY POOP BUTTER!!!!!!!!!

September 22, 2009
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auctorial descriptives -or- literary eponymous adjectives

i have always been fascinated by demonyms and so i compiled this fairly* exhaustive list on similar terms related to authors. what really tickles my pickle are: 1. the irregularities (given in italics) and 2. the authors that have not been adjectivised:

Asimovian, Austenian, Baconian, Ballardian, Balzacian, Borgesian, Brechtian, Bunyanesque, Byronic, Carrollian, Cartesian, Chaucerian, Checkovian, Chestertonian, Conradian, Dantesque, Dickensian, Durrellian, Dostoevskian, Emersonian, Erasmian, Faulknerian, Gravesian, Homeric, Huxleyan, Jamesian, Joycean, Juvenalian, Kafkaesque, Lawrentian, Lovecraftian, Machiavellian, Marlovian, Maughamian, Menippean, Miltonic, Nabokovian, Orwellian, Pinteresque, Poundian, Proustian, Rabelaisian, Randian, sadistic†, Sapphic, Sartrean, Shakespearean, Shavian, Spenserian, Tennysonian, Thurberesque, Thoreauvian, Tolkienian, Tolstoyan, Trollopian, Vergilian, Voltairean, Vonnegutian, Waughian, Wildean, Woolfian.

notice: huxleyan and tolstoyan BUT dostevskian
miltonic and byronic‡ BUT chestertonian
marlovian, thoreauvian, and shavian BUT waughian
pinteresque and thurberesque BUT spenserian

conspicuously absent: twain, poe, hemingway, conan doyle, ibsen, dickinson, rowling <gag>, wallace, et alii

see also: the literary onomasticon and/or this humorous article.

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*i say fairly because i omitted a bunch of classical “writers” that we really don’t owe any sort of credit to. seriously, what literary legacy of any value did the greeks or romans leave for us?

†this adjective from the marquis de sade is the only term on the list that is genuinely lowercase.

‡there are scads of great rhyming words here for my man, baba.

jim, vlad, tommy &amp; raynor: a cosmic link
last thursday, i posted a map that vladimir nabokov used when teaching joyce to thomas pynchon. an anonymous operative in dublin axed me where he could get a higher-rez image and i promised that i would look into the matter. this is how my quest starts. how it ends is with me pawing through nabokov&#8217;s original papers in the inner-most sanctum of the new york public library. here is the in-between stuff:
part the first: a map quest
the original map is housed in the morgan collection of the nypl. since i was going to be in the city this weekend with some time to kill, i thought i would try and see how close that i could come to getting my greasy mitts on a facsimilie of the map.
i have a long and sordid history of infiltrating libraries and figured that the nypl would be lemon pound cake. it wasn&#8217;t. it took 3 levels of access (for which i had no ready documentation) and a lot of paperwork. ultimately the decision came down to the morgan curator, donna barker. my access would be based entirely upon her assessment of 1. how legit that i was (i am not legit) and 2. the reasons for my wanting to see nabokov&#8217;s unpublished papers (a whim? scorching curiosity?).
after a lot of blah-blah-blahing i was admitted into room 444. donna then reviewed my paperwork and grilled me for fifteen minutes before finally acquiescing. within the hour i received a folder containing not facsimiles of nabokov&#8217;s papers but the real deal—coffee ringed, besmudged, finger-printed, mothball-scented* handwritten notes of one of the giants of western literature!
part the second: notes on his notes
i have handled highly revered objects before. i have made small talk with authors that i admire at book signings. but i have never lost my shit the way i did when a librarian dropped a big folder with nabokov&#8217;s personal writings into my lap and told me to go to town. after composing myself, i was able to make a few notes. here are some (in bullet form for ease of reading):
there were actually 3 different versions of the maps all with mostly the same information. each was on standard letter-sized typing paper.
nabokov&#8217;s handwriting was meticulous and bold with an occasional flourish. i was delighted to see that at points he lapsed into [what appeared to be] sütterlinschrift (seen especially in his medial s&#8217;s).
the maps themselves were not very different from standard ones like this and this. 
nabokov calculates that bloom walks 5 miles throughout the day.
for reasons not readily understandable, he drew england about 1,000 feet off the coast of dublin.
while i was sifting through personal notes written by one of the top writers of the twentieth century, sitting in a room containing original manuscripts and love letters by the likes of woolf, pound, yeats, kerouac and james, the curator was reading a patrick o&#8217;brian novel.
in the end, donna would NOT let me photocopy anything. she said that i would first need to get the permission of dmitri nabokov. i joked that dmitiri would probably oblige given his latest decision regarding his father&#8217;s literary estate. this joke did not go over so well.
dmitiri however, failed to prevent me from taking notes and i WAS able to recreate the whole map on my own little scrap of paper. perhaps in 500 years, some pesky hoverboard-riding blogger might con his way into the new nypl so as to catch a quick peak of the raynor/nabokov/joyce map. or perhaps it will wind up as trash and a hobo will use it to toilet train his golden retreiver. only time will tell.
*yes, i sniffed it.

jim, vlad, tommy & raynor: a cosmic link

last thursday, i posted a map that vladimir nabokov used when teaching joyce to thomas pynchon. an anonymous operative in dublin axed me where he could get a higher-rez image and i promised that i would look into the matter. this is how my quest starts. how it ends is with me pawing through nabokov’s original papers in the inner-most sanctum of the new york public library. here is the in-between stuff:

part the first: a map quest

the original map is housed in the morgan collection of the nypl. since i was going to be in the city this weekend with some time to kill, i thought i would try and see how close that i could come to getting my greasy mitts on a facsimilie of the map.

i have a long and sordid history of infiltrating libraries and figured that the nypl would be lemon pound cake. it wasn’t. it took 3 levels of access (for which i had no ready documentation) and a lot of paperwork. ultimately the decision came down to the morgan curator, donna barker. my access would be based entirely upon her assessment of 1. how legit that i was (i am not legit) and 2. the reasons for my wanting to see nabokov’s unpublished papers (a whim? scorching curiosity?).

after a lot of blah-blah-blahing i was admitted into room 444. donna then reviewed my paperwork and grilled me for fifteen minutes before finally acquiescing. within the hour i received a folder containing not facsimiles of nabokov’s papers but the real deal—coffee ringed, besmudged, finger-printed, mothball-scented* handwritten notes of one of the giants of western literature!

part the second: notes on his notes

i have handled highly revered objects before. i have made small talk with authors that i admire at book signings. but i have never lost my shit the way i did when a librarian dropped a big folder with nabokov’s personal writings into my lap and told me to go to town. after composing myself, i was able to make a few notes. here are some (in bullet form for ease of reading):

  • there were actually 3 different versions of the maps all with mostly the same information. each was on standard letter-sized typing paper.
  • nabokov’s handwriting was meticulous and bold with an occasional flourish. i was delighted to see that at points he lapsed into [what appeared to be] sütterlinschrift (seen especially in his medial s’s).
  • the maps themselves were not very different from standard ones like this and this.
  • nabokov calculates that bloom walks 5 miles throughout the day.
  • for reasons not readily understandable, he drew england about 1,000 feet off the coast of dublin.
  • while i was sifting through personal notes written by one of the top writers of the twentieth century, sitting in a room containing original manuscripts and love letters by the likes of woolf, pound, yeats, kerouac and james, the curator was reading a patrick o’brian novel.
  • in the end, donna would NOT let me photocopy anything. she said that i would first need to get the permission of dmitri nabokov. i joked that dmitiri would probably oblige given his latest decision regarding his father’s literary estate. this joke did not go over so well.
  • dmitiri however, failed to prevent me from taking notes and i WAS able to recreate the whole map on my own little scrap of paper. perhaps in 500 years, some pesky hoverboard-riding blogger might con his way into the new nypl so as to catch a quick peak of the raynor/nabokov/joyce map. or perhaps it will wind up as trash and a hobo will use it to toilet train his golden retreiver. only time will tell.

*yes, i sniffed it.

nabokov maps ulysses

In 1969, Nabokov told an interviewer, &#8220;Instead of perpetuating the pretentious nonsense of Homeric, chromatic, and visceral chapter headings, instructors should prepare maps of Dublin with Bloom&#8217;s and Stephen&#8217;s intertwining itineraries clearly traced.&#8221; Nabokov drew just such a map as part of his lecture notes for Ulysses. via

nabokov? joyce? maps? drawings? this image is a burrito of all my favourite things (note: joyce is the guacamole in this metaphor). would you not have donated a litre of your own spinal fluid to audit this lecture‽ added bonus: you would have been able to pass notes to thomas pynchon!
know this as well: nabokov and joyce actually met eachother once in berlin in 1937. the hungarian national football team figured prominently in that encounter.

nabokov maps ulysses

In 1969, Nabokov told an interviewer, “Instead of perpetuating the pretentious nonsense of Homeric, chromatic, and visceral chapter headings, instructors should prepare maps of Dublin with Bloom’s and Stephen’s intertwining itineraries clearly traced.” Nabokov drew just such a map as part of his lecture notes for Ulysses. via

nabokov? joyce? maps? drawings? this image is a burrito of all my favourite things (note: joyce is the guacamole in this metaphor). would you not have donated a litre of your own spinal fluid to audit this lecture‽ added bonus: you would have been able to pass notes to thomas pynchon!

know this as well: nabokov and joyce actually met eachother once in berlin in 1937. the hungarian national football team figured prominently in that encounter.

a further note on pronunciations

despite what sting says, it’s pronounced nuh-BAWK-off (and his first name is vluh-DEEMER).

and as long as i am making updates, it has come to my attention that the ape is another [non-avian] onomatopoetic animal.

for wunderkammer: a karner blue butterfly (a rare lepidoptera species that was first discovered by vladimir nabokov)

for wunderkammer: a karner blue butterfly (a rare lepidoptera species that was first discovered by vladimir nabokov)

colored writing

some thoughts on color terms as applied to writing:

  • PURPLE prose is unnecessarily flowery writing
  • YELLOW journalism is sensational writing
  • BLUE literature is erotic writing
  • BLACK humor is tragicomic writing
  • GREEN texts are environmental writing

some semi-related items:

  • vladimir nabokov claimed that he saw individual words as certain colors which is type of synesthesia.
  • the writing system of the edo people is chromatographic (one which uses different colors to symbolize different letters)

nabokov reads the first lines of lolita in both english and russian.

via

November 24, 2008
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disclaimer