ragbag miscellany

none of the 2,000 wikipedia tabs that are still open in my netscape browser window merit their own post. but perhaps if i aggregate them into a larger collection they may somehow combine like voltron robots into something greater than the sum of their parts.

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gangkhar puensum is the world’s 40th highest mountain. more importantly, it’s also the world’s highest unclimbed mountain. what makes it all the more mystical is that nobody really knows where it is (due to the lack of mapping in bhutan), nobody really knows how tall it is for sure, and the bhutanese government will come after you with all its might if you go near it because climbing mountains in bhutan is considered disrespectful to the gods.

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the three surviving ancient forests in england are: new forest, forest of dean, and epping forest.

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in pre 20th century britain, the name maria was pronounced muh-rye-uh (as in carey). in the 1900s its pronunciation was influenced by the “muh-ree-uh” of romance languages.

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the oldest surviving european place name in the united states is florida. it was named by the biggest ponce of them all: ponce de leon in 1513 and means “flowery land”. he subsequently named the dry tortugas (the turtles, 1513). the third oldest surviving european place name is cape canaveral which means something like “the cape of dense thickets of cane.”

something that happened

here we have a list of original titles of famous books. some of them are absolutely mindboggling. would alice in wonderland have done as well at the boxoffice this last weekend if it was still called alice’s adventures underground? is there something appealing about catch-22 that catch-18 lacks? would anyone have ever purchased gone with the wind if it were instead published under the gooferific title, ba ba black sheep?

• incident at west egg · the great gatsby
• stephen hero · portrait of the artist as a young man
  
• the sea cook · treasure island
  
• first impressions · pride and prejudice
• all’s well that ends well* · war and peace
• alice’s adventures underground · alice in wonderland
  
• the last man in europe · 1984
• tenderness · lady chatterley’s lover
• elinor and marianne · sense and sensibility
  
• the summer of the shark · jaws
• catch-18 · catch-22
• ba ba black sheep · gone with the wind
• a jewish patient begins his analysis · portnoy’s complaint
• the various arms · to have and have not
• bar-b-q · the postman always rings twice
• something that happened · of mice and men

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*or according to seinfeld: war, what is good for?

words wholly related

font & fondue

both come from the french word fondre which means “to melt.” fondue makes use of melted cheese and/or chocolate. fonts were originally made from cast metal but are now made from discarded pixels.

the 20 most common dreams among college students in 1958

what is your favourite flavour of family feud? the al from home improvement one? the j. peterman one? for my money, it is and always has been the louie anderson version.

let’s roleplay. let us suppose that you are a fairly attractive girl-nextdoor type from a fairly typical american family and i am louie anderson, a comedic giant. i saddle up to you like a disoriented bear just reëmerging from hibernation—a tide of titillation washes over your supple flesh. with the irresistible breath of yesterday’s cheese curds and in the voice of fran drescher, i ask you, “what do college students in 1958 dream about while asleep?” i have rocked your world. take a moment to compose yourself and respond.

here are the answers:

20. killing someone
19. seeing oneself as dead
18. failing an examination
17. fire
16. being nude in public
15. being smothered
14. being inappropriately dressed
13. snakes
12. swimming
11. finding money
10. being locked up
9. a loved one is dead
8. being frozen with fright
7. eating
6. arriving too late
5. sexual experiences
4. school, teachers, and studying
3. trying repeatedly to do something
2. being attacked or pursued
1. falling

we are done roleplaying (for now) so i will point out—if you haven’t already pieced it together—that the dreams dreamt in 1958 are the same dreams dreamt by you, me² and louie anderson today—and will probably be the exact same dreams dreamt in the future by our great great cyborg grandchildren.

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1. from “the universality of typical dreams” by griffith, miyagi, and tago (1958).
2. conspicuously absent from this list is my reöccurring dream where i assassinate muammar al-gaddafi by sneezing my tooth fillings into his carotid artery.

words wholly related -or- words wholly unrelated

junior etymologists from across the information super highway have very kindly sent me their own list of words that may or may not be related to other words. here are the best of them.

• my ex-lover’s ex-lover, matt langer writes to tell us that shebang (a nerdy mark for for unix nerds) and interrobang (a nerdy mark for grammar nerds) are wholly related through banging—where bang is slang for the exclamation point!

• my current union rep, billiam dalto has informed me that mosaic and mosaic (with a capital m) are wholly unrelated. the former, meaning “the juxtaposition of colours and patterns,” comes from the latin word, mosaicus and is related to the word muse. the latter is an eponym for christendom’s own wily muse—moses malone.

• my færie godfather, albert jorgenson had clued me into an etymological hat trick: host, host and host are wholly unrelated. host in the ecclesiastical sense means “sacrificial victim” and comes from the latin word, hostia. host in the riders of rohan sense (a company of armed men) comes from the latin word, hostis. And host in the sense of the farmer that feeds you fried chicken and strawberry rhubarb pie and lets you doggystyle his daughter in a hayloft comes from the latin word, hospes.

trivia tuesday

what landmark statue, erected in 1885 was the first sight that immigrants (and anyone else) entering new york harbor would gaze upon?

hint: this is not a trick question. also, the predecessor of this statue resides in my hometown.

answer

trivia tuesday

name an animal whose body is not symmetric.

after consulting with elaine benes, you can find a very unsymmetrical animal here.

words wholly unrelated

counsel & council

they are pronounced the same and have overlapping meanings yet they are from two totally different latin words. the former is from consulere (to consult), the latter is from concilium (assembly).

concerning butterflies

i thought i would write a post today that didn’t involve freaky sex terms or raw fraternity boy potty humor… and so, like nabokov, i turned to butterflies! but then i came across this factoid [alert: it has the potential of (figuratively) spoiling your butter]:

• butterflies were so named because butter was thought to be similar in both colour and consistency to butterfly excrement.

oh boy! my first dog was named snickers for similar reasons. again, i have verified the etymology but not the semblance.

1moretime: THEY ARE CALLED BUTTERFLIES BECAUSE THEY POOP BUTTER!!!!!!!!!

words wholly related

pork chops & porcelain

both are ultimately from the latin porcus meaning pig. porcelain chinaware was so named because of its resemblance to the cowrie “porcella” shell. the porcella shell was so named because of its apparent resemblance to she-pig pudenda.

note: while i HAVE verified the etymology, i have NOT verified the visual similarity.

further note: yet.

it’s that time again

ever since my casio® digital watch got stuck on the 24-hour clock, so did i. like the american military (and everyone else in the world (including the portugese)) i dig its clarity°. one thing that i have always found confusing is determing if noon is 12:00 am or 12:00 pm. according to sticklers—it isn’t either. noon is the ONLY time on the dial that is neither before nor after midday—it IS midday.

stylewise, if it is not possible to write noon, a preferred way to note this time in the 12-hour system is:

12:00 m.

no joke.

ø, denmark

is a real place. imagine all the hours of your life you will save when writing down your address as a little null set sign. also: quiffins live there!